She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
it's great music for shaving your balls
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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