so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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