Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
