North Korea, Best Korea!
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
