I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
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