the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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