what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Someone shit on the floor
worst night to have a conscience
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
