This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Man, jail baloney is awful.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize