Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Randomize