I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Couch. On fire.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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