Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Randomize
