So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
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