The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
