Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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