That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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