I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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