Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
