She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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