just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
