What a fucking waste of an outfit
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
