Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
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