Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
