i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
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