I wannas sexs uuuuu
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize