I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
