does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
