Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
