i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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