did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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