I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
wat bout pragnant strippers??
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
