I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
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