You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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