Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
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