Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Say something about gay babies.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize