Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize
