dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
