I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
