I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize
