god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
