oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
