And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize
