You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
