Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
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