I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
