This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
