This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
