The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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