YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Randomize
