5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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