i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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